I don't usually ask for advice on this blog... honestly I seem to get enough without actually asking for it.
BUT I need some advice.
My daughter Olivia is 3 1/2 and we have been potty training her for about a year. I am casual about it for the most part... after potty training my son with Autism I figured it wasn't worth the stress to make a huge deal about it.
But after this long I started thinking something might be wrong. Because she is not resistant to going pee on the potty. Not at all. She will happily pee on the potty for me anytime I ask her too. Well, she would until a few days ago anyway.
For my sons the biggest hurdle was their willingness to actually use the potty. Once we got over that it took a few days and they were potty trained. Granted I waited until they were both 3 & 4 years old to do it but still... it was relatively easy.
My daughter started asking to use the potty over a year ago.
She goes pee a teeny tiny amount each time in the potty... then she gets up and 5-10 minutes later pees her pants- again, just a teeny tiny amount but enough that she needs to change her underwear and pants. And then we start the whole process again.
This happens about 15-20 times per day.
No, I am not exaggerating. We do entire loads of just her bottoms often.
About 2 weeks ago she mentioned that it hurt when she went pee so I thought maybe she had a bladder infection or something. We went to see the doctor and no, she doesn't.
BUT the doctor thinks that she might actually have a physical bladder issue- he thinks it is probably too small so she feels like she has to pee all the time urgently so she is unable to hold it. He said it is possible that her bladder is too big and just never empties fully but he doesn't think so.
He is sending her to a specialist in the big city 4-ish hours away and he think they will want to do a whole bunch of tests on her.
The thing is that Olivia is supposed to start junior kindergarten in 6 weeks. Obviously she can't go to school in diapers.
Junior kindergarten is technically optional here but EVERYONE goes and when we arrived here from a place that didn't have junior kindergarten my boys were both a full year behind everyone else in their classes because they didn't take it. So really I don't feel like she should miss it. And I have no intention of homeschooling her, I already have a job thank-you very much.
The doctor told me if it is a medical issue she can go to school anyway which is good to know.
He said he would try to get us in to the specialist asap so we know.
Here is where the advice part comes in....
Should I still be trying to potty train her? Should I continue to try and get her to pee in the potty? Should I continue putting her in underwear and pants?
She has started to be VERY frustrated with constantly wetting herself and I don't want her to get so frustrated she wants to stop trying. I don't want her to feel bad about the whole thing.
She never gets in trouble for it and she can fully undress and clothe herself. We already use stickers and rewards and all that other regular potty training stuff.
If it is in a regular potty training advice column or book I already know it so don't bother telling me :) .
She has stopped even attempting to poo on the potty though. She will ask to put on a diaper. And she is going poo like 6 or 7 times per day. No, I am not exaggerating. She is not constipated and it is not diarrhea. She is not sick and she is not complaining about a sick tummy or anything. She has been doing this forever. I just always assumed it was because she was a baby... but she's not anymore.
What should I do? Just leave her in diapers or pull ups until we see the specialist? What if we see the specialist and they say there is nothing wrong, she is just being difficult? Then I've wasted all this time not trying.
I never knew I would have this much trouble potty training with my THIRD child. I trained a kid with Autism for goodness sake! And that is not easy!
So any of you medical-professional or special-needs parents or brilliant experts out there have any advice?
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