Actual conversation around the supper table last night:
Me: Are you excited to go to school tomorrow Aiden?
Aiden: No. The school is hiding men.
Me: WHAT??? ( confused)
Aiden: The school is hiding men! (spoken like he believes they are trying to trick him)
Me: What kind of men?
Aiden: The men are hiding in the costumes. They are lying. They are bad!
Me: WHAT??? Where are they hiding??? (starting to feel slightly alarmed)
Aiden: I don't KNOW where they are but I am GOING to find out!! When I see one with his mouth open I am going to grab his face and look inside and SEE the human! They are tricky.
Owen: the Cat is in a costume and the Dog is in a costume and the Bee is in a costume. BUT I looked at the Bee's wrist and I SAW skin and I KNEW it was a HUMAN!!!
Me: oh (dissolving into laughter) you mean the MASCOTS at the parade!??
Owen: the CAT is a HUMAN! the DOG is a HUMAN! and the BEE is a HUMAN! I KNEW it had a zipper on the back! (spoken emphatically with conviction as though solving a great mystery)
Me: bwahahahahahahahahahahaha oh you guys they are just playing pretend! They aren't lying they are just PRETENDING to be a cat and a dog and a bee! Like Halloween costumes! bwahahahahahahaha (tears running down face from laughing so hard)
Aiden: (looking at me wondering why I am laughing) We KNEW it was a human so we have to get rid of those guys! (very serious)
boys: leaving table looking at me with disgust for clearly NOT understanding the gravity of the situation
Me, Doug, Grandma: howling with laughter
Grandma: wasn't the parade over a week ago?
Me: yep (still laughing)
Grandma: wow... they've really been thinking this over! We should have explained mascots to them.
Me: (holding sides from laughing) I'll get right on that.