no pants

As I'm sure most of you have figured out I review books and products sometimes. I really enjoy doing it. Some of the products get delivered by UPS. Unfortunately the particular UPS person who delivers to my home seems to be unable to read my address. They keep delivering my packages to my neighbour down the street- FAR down the street.

He came about an hour ago to hand me about the 8th package in the past couple weeks and he is ticked.

I can tell.

So I am apologizing to the poor man and assuring him I will call UPS and everyone else to help clarify where I live. Perhaps I should add my house colour to the packing slip. Or "just look for the overweight crazy lady with three kids hanging off her saying no and whining".

As the very kind gentleman is returning to his truck my children run outside after him. My daughter is partially clothed. My son Owen is sticking his tongue out and making weird faces. My son Aiden was in his UNDERWEAR!!! I told them to go back inside and Aiden looked at me and said NO then ran after the poor fleeing man in the truck.

I think I have been very patient with Aiden's need to remove his pants promptly upon arriving home from school. I realize school is stressful for him and he just wants to be comfortable. I get it. Life is stressful for me and I don't wander around in MY underwear but that is not the point. He KNOWS he is not allowed to go outside in his underwear. Ever. And certainly not to chase an unsuspecting neighbour down the road in defiance.

I. WAS. SO. MAD.

I brought my two youngest offspring into the house and told them to stay put while I went out to my front deck to scream at my son to come back in the house RIGHT THIS MINUTE!!! As soon as he got inside I yelled at him and sent him to his bed. Of course Owen had to get into the action by sticking his tongue out at me and calling me a loser so he also got sent to his bed.

Then I called their father and informed him that he had to come home RIGHT NOW before I throttled our children.

And he did.

And I called the UPS people and told them to learn to read.

She assured me she would give my message to our local delivery office.

Ya. Right.

See ya next week poor unsuspecting neighbour. I promise to try and keep my partially clothed offspring from chasing after you again. I really am so very sorry.

Apparently I am raising barbarians.

Good to know.

Comments

Kelly said…
oh that is just too funny! it sounds like my niece and nephew!!!
ChristiS said…
would it make you feel any better if I told you about the summer that Adam ran around everywhere, including outside, with NO pants or underwear?!
Hopefully this too, shall pass!
queenoftheclick said…
I understand Aiden. :)

I too come home and need to get out of the pants. I need to be free. I put on short shorts though because someone is always ringing the bell.

I do have a question for you though. When your husband the pastor comes home, does he speak peacefully with the children? That's what I imagine happens....kind of like Little House on the Prarie, but more modern.
Natalie said…
hehehehe! too funny! you are doing fine... children for some reason think that they get to think for themselves! agh!!!
Laurel said…
Tara - Thanks so much for visiting me:). I thought you might want to know that Elizabeth Mendies died just this week. Her funeral is today as a matter of fact. I've meant to do more with MH while here but it actually isn't very close to us. Maybe this will be the year!
You know, we're supposed to "become like little children", so maybe rather than fight him, you could join him. Imagine how free you'd feel running after the UPS man in no pants... (well, until they locked you up anyway).
:-)
From one "loser"and "I hate you" recipient to another, these are good times my friend, cheers!
LOL, that is too funny Tara. My girls aren't too keen on wearing clothes either. Sorry to hear about your experiences with the UPS man!

I can't help myself - I'm about to give a piece of controversial advice :) - have you tried spanking the little darling?

We never ever used to spank our children, don't know if you do, but I know someone recommended it to me once (was shocked as all get out, so I'll understand if you are offended ;) ), and hey, they have improved :).
JenniBeanV said…
Oh noooooo! LOL!

If it makes you feel any better...my boys went out front NAKED once while I was in the shower. I have never been so mortified...or without a deadbolt up to high for them to reach.
ROFL! Tara I can just see it all going down...I know it wasn't funny at the time but it has to make you chuckle...just a big :-)

Hugs!

Melissa
Paula said…
Don't be too hard on yourself it's all the UPS man's fault, if he hadn't delivered it by mistake your son wouldn't be running after your neighbor at all. ;)
You and me both!

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