My children are conspiring against me. Their plan is to get me as sleep deprived as possible and then do a coup where they take over the house and eat cookies and drink kool-aid and throw things and hit stuff all day long. Today may be their lucky day. I am exhausted.
My boys took turns waking up for the first half of the night (mommy, it's too hot to sleep. mommy, I want a drink. mommy, I have to go poop. I want to sleep with you mommy. mommy, mommy, mommy.) Then once they were both finally settled it was about 1:00 am and Olivia's turn to keep me up. She got up at 5 am. And stayed up. Until the boys woke up at 6:30 am. Then she went back to sleep. There is no justice.
My husband has been gone all weekend in another town performing a wedding ceremony for the son of one of our elders. He got to have all sorts of alone time and sleep all the way through two nights and then to top it off he got to SLEEP IN. I haven't slept in in over 5 years. I miss sleeping in. Heck, I haven't slept through the night in over 5 years. I miss sleeping through the night.
I remember in my previous pre-kids life I used to occasionally sleep until noon. noon. In my present day life I have already been up for 6 or 7 hours by the time noon rolls around. I really do miss sleep.
And you know what people? There are more important things in life than a perfect lawn. If you are one of those people who get annoyed at your next door neighbour because they have too many weeds in their lawn then STOP IT. GET OVER IT. NOW. It is just a lawn people. And honestly have you ever considered that they may have more important things to do than to make sure their lawn is nicely manicured? I mean really. If it bothers you that much then YOU do it. Maybe they are too busy taking care of their 3 kids and congregation full of people with issues. Maybe they would LOVE to have time to spend hours on their yard like you do but instead they get to change endless diapers and play transformers. Maybe they are too broke to buy the weed killer stuff. Maybe they figure feeding their kids is more important than dandelions. And really, does it matter if a toy is left in the front yard? Will it kill you? Just ignore it. Attempt to have an ounce of compassion and MIND YOUR OWN FREAKIN BUSINESS. In the grand scheme of things does it really matter? When I stand before my Lord on judgment day will He say to me "I'd like to let you into heaven but you failed to keep your lawn up to my standards". NO. He won't. SO GET OVER IT.
I am just far too tired to deal with people who get annoyed over the state of my lawn. It makes me want to let my kids eat cookies, drink kool-aid and send them over to my neighbours houses to throw and hit stuff. However, if someone would like to make it possible for me to catch up on my sleep, hire me a maid and a nanny and get me a bag of extra cash then I will be glad to manicure my lawn to their high standards.
This rant has been brought to you by the sleep deprived pastor's wife and mother of 3.
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